There is no point in staying in this mental space any longer. It served me for a while, when I was creating healthy boundaries, it was useful. When I was considering what I wanted in a relationship, it was useful. But now that I have those things, that I know my own worth and what I want out of my life, it doesn’t serve me.
I learned a lot about myself, about my gifts and for that I am grateful. I learned how to be true in myself and to stand firm in what I believe to be righteous and fair. My way of life doesn’t need to be for anyone but me and I’m happy in that, I don’t need others to understand or embrace the life I have created because I understand and embrace it.
That’s the biggest takeaway from all of this shit. From the way my parents raised me to the warlock who dedicated his life to stalking me, all that matters is that I know myself and what I am capable of.
Turns out, I’m capable of a hell of a lot. Things I would never have learned had it not been for these people in my life. I wouldn’t be as strong as I am, as smart as I am and as driven as I am to have the life that I want if it wasn’t for these people pushing me to my limits.
So how can I hate any of it? I can’t so I won’t.
I’m ok with being different, with being misunderstood. It doesn’t matter what my family thinks, what my racist aunt and cousins believe, what my brother and his family understand.
What matters is what I understand about myself. It’s mind over matter really, that’s what TM has taught me. My mind is peaceful because of TM and because it is peaceful, I am also at peace. The past is what it is, the warlock can no longer hurt me. If I can let things go, they can’t continue to hurt me and honestly, what is worth holding onto?
The lessons.
That’s it. There are valuable lessons that I can take with me into the life I am building and the rest of it can stay in the past, on this old timeline that I no longer resonate with. The new paradigm is finally here and whatever has to stay behind in order for me to get on it, is staying behind.
So, I heal. Earnestly, with the intention of moving into a new consciousness. I don’t know what a better motivator could be than that. I suppose to others there are more desirable things but for me, a higher state of consciousness is what I ultimately desire. A new paradigm with new rules and new possibilities.
Yes Please.
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